My Own Destruction
by meikouhaikitsune
Summary: It's pretty hard to fight a war when the only person you're fighting is yourself.
1. Identity

A/N: Yes. I know. I haven't finished my other stories. Oh bloody wel

Notice: Updates will come periodically but by no means on a schedule.

**Warning: Slash, people, and if it offends you. Skip it.**

* * *

_**Identity: **_the sense of self, providing sameness and continuity in personality over time and sometimes disturbed in mental illnesses, as schizophrenia.

""He who defines duty for himself is his own master."" Dick Cheatman

"Do you know why we have these rules in place?"

A nod.

"Then you also know why we can't let this go unpunished."

"But I had nothing to do with th-"

"…you did have something to do with it, you had everything to do with it. Now we have two versions of you, running around Hogwarts."

There was silence in the dim room; barely anything was recognizable besides shadows.

"Mister Potter, we have come to know that as you were divided, you became two entities and it seems that the one we see before is the darkness in your former self. You cannot continue to exist in a divided state."

"But I have no idea how this happened!!" Harry lied. The shadows shook their heads.

"We are above the Ministry, we are above your Headmaster and we are above the Founders. We know everything." Harry was shuddering in fear as the dimness around him became darkness and he faded from existence.

**Outside of ****London**** , July 31 1997**

Harry groaned as he curled onto his side. They hadn't been lying when they said he would cease to exist. If the pain continued on like this, he swore he would die.

They had cursed him, and beaten him; at one point he had thought they would have him Kissed, or sent him to Azkaban.

His very bones hurt. He could swear he hurt in places he hadn't known existed until he felt the pain. It seemed as if his very soul had been bruised, not just his body.

Apparation was his best friend at the moment. He would have to thank the twins later for their little gift of teaching him in case he was in a tight spot. He gripped his wand tightly as it lay in his hand and tried to think of a healing spell.

Just when his pain began to fade, he screamed loudly as he felt one of his bones pop itself back into place.

His bleeding lip was starting to close and his nose didn't sting as much. He held his leg as the throbbing pain became a dull ache. He used the sleeve of his tattered robe to wipe the blood off his face and he stood, smirking enigmatically.

They would die.

He closed his eyes and concentrated. There were two of them now . . . He could chose to join his other self or Voldemort. He grimaced in pain before Apparating away.

**Underground, London July 31 1997**

Voldemort resisted the urge to jump when someone Apparated into his dwelling, directly before him. None of his followers were capable of such a feat. Those he had set to protect this place had been unable to prevent this invasion as well.

He looked into emerald eyes and almost did a double take.

"Giving yourself over so easily Potter?" he taunted as the young man looked at him in boredom.

"Harry Potter is half way across Europe at Hogwarts."

Voldemort sat up and twined his fingers in front of himself, his curiosity captured.

"Really, and who would that make you?"

"Lucifer," the intruder answered smugly.

"Ah, the devil then?"

"I will be when I get my hands on my enemies."

"Them, you mean the Death Eaters."

"No, I mean the gods; and anyone at Hogwarts that stands in my way."

"Such a change of heart…Lucifer."

"Well, you could say, that my priorities have been split."

"Then you would be a Potter."

"I was. They demanded I chose a side in this War and banished me when my magic made the decision for me. I am the dark remnants of The-Boy-Who-Lived-To-Gather-Everyone's-Pity." Lucifer said as his eyes became a darker forest green than even the Slytherin's emblematic colour.

"Then I think we are in agreement."

Lucifer nodded as the two shared a sinister smile that seemed to scare the Death Eaters standing guard as one of them dropped their wand with a clatter.

**Voldemort's Dwelling, Underground, London July 31 1997  
**  
Lucifer sighed as he fell against his bed. Voldemort had given him a room, and a lavish room it was. The bedding was made of the finest silks, and the size of the bed itself astounded him. It was bigger than the cupboard below the stairs that had been his bedroom growing up, even larger than one of the rooms at the Dursley's.

That was more people he had to add to his Hit List – the Dursleys.

He closed his eyes and turned onto his side, getting comfortable on the bed. His heart skipped a beat, though, when pain laced his body and a scream jammed itself in his throat. His skin glowed as his eyes dilated before contracting; leaving his pupils gold with a black out line where there should have been white.

He held his head in his hands and felt his skull burning. His arms ached and his legs began to burn, before he could even scream it was over and something outside of his vision exploded as things began rattling. His breathing ceased ephemerally and then he was out cold. His breath escaped his parted lips softly.

The room was silent, as was its occupant, but outside the door banging could be heard through the hall as almost a dozen house elves pounded on the doors trying to get in when magic wouldn't allow them to.

**August 1 1997**

Lucifer awoke and rushed to the bathroom, hoping the door he chose was indeed the bathroom. It was a moment of brilliance when he realized that he'd chosen correctly and he dashed over to the toilet with a fit of dry heaves. He hoped that he wasn't actually sick and that the waves of pain would cease soon. He was rewarded when they did. He moved to the sink, splashing cold water onto his face; after grabbing a towel and drying his face and hair off he left the room, making his way to the dining hall.

After the initial tour that Voldemort had given him, the layout seemed to stick to his mind. In actuality there were only a few bedrooms, a library, a sitting room and a dining hall.

When he entered the dining hall, almost thirty wands were drawn on him, including Voldemort's.

"Who are you?" one of the Death Eaters demanded.

"Fucking Merlin, we just went over this," Lucifer cursed at the hall.

Voldemort looked him over and lowered his wand. "Lucifer,"

"Really now? When'd you figure that out?"

Voldemort hissed. :_Crucio! You will show me respect before my followers, if not when we are alone!.:_

Lucifer hissed as he walked to an open seat at the table, the Cruciatus curse feeling merely odd compared to the pain he had felt in the past few days.

:_I did not come here to bow at your feet_: the Cruciatus was broken as Lucifer looked Voldemort directly in the eyes.:_I am no more your enemy than I am your ally. Do not assume that I came to you for help. If anything, you need me. I am no tool, and I will not act like one. If you want some one to fawn over you, call that bitch_ _Bellatrix.:_ The angry hisses of Parseltongue that came from him scared the Death Eaters sitting by him and Voldemort looked even more pissed off than he had been at the beginning of the conversation, which left no arguments as to why he was angry. The Death Eaters ingeniously stayed quiet.

"Get out...NOW!" Voldemort roared. The Death Eaters were scrambling out of their chairs heading for the doors as Lucifer sat calmly and ate. Voldemort stared at him with furious red eyes that seemed to bleed.

"Even_** you **_are not permitted to speak to me with such blatant disrespect!"

"In case you haven't noticed; I already have."

Voldemort was across the room in seconds with his hand landing on the young man's throat as he scrambled to stand up, the chair tumbling over behind them both. Voldemort's force pushing Lucifer over as they both stumbled onto the chair, Lucifer lying against it as Voldemort straddled his waist.

Lucifer's eyes dilated and his breathing hitched. Voldemort could see and feel the changes respectively, and instead of his hand tightening to the point of death; he gave the young man just enough room to breathe as he nuzzled just behind Lucifer's ear.

"How curious? You seem to be enjoying this." Lucifer could feel the blood on his throat as the nails of the man above him dug into his skin harshly.

"As do you." he whispered hoarsely, a cocky undertone to the words.

"Ah, but Lucifer, that's just the thing. I do enjoy seeing you in pain." The young man moaned beneath Voldemort's gaze. His own bloody eyes dilated slightly as he looked at the beautiful body beneath him.

Long, messy black hair, bright emerald eyes that had been black and gold moments before. A lithe body that was hard, telling him that Lucifer's body was muscled.

"All the signs of magical blood, yet you love this threat of danger…." Voldemort muttered as he pushed his weight on to the boy who moaned.

"Help me kill them… please…" he begged as Voldemort sat above him, his weight pushing against Lucifer's hardness.

"What do I get in return?" was the hissed question.

Lucifer whimpered in the back of his throat softly, "Me. You get me." he replied and Lord Voldemort smiled, a horrific smile that put Lucifer on edge as the Dark Lord started to rock against him harshly; the rough rhythm pushing Lucifer over the brink. "Fuck," he uttered as his head thumped back against the chair; his body falling out of its arch.  
**  
****Hogwarts September 1, 1997**

"Harry, Harry! Are you ready to go?" Hermione asked as she stood beside him with her backpack slung over her shoulder.

The boy literally shook himself out of his daze, then smiled reassuringly at his friend and nodded.

"Sure, is Ron meeting us down there?" Hermione smiled and tightened her hold on her pack.

"Yeah, he is, come on." She said before walking away with Harry behind her.


	2. Motion

**Title: **My Own Destruction  
**Summary: **Harry is divided into two beings when he cannot chose a side in the war. His darker counter part seems to be the more dominant of the two. Especially when Lucifer joins Voldemort. Leaving the light of Harry to strive against the growing darkness.  
**Warnings:** Slash, Graphic stuff (real mature, haha.) Death, Torture. All the good things in life.  
**Beta:** Probably still **mizstorge**/pipenerd, if not she'll say otherwise.

* * *

**Motion (idiom): **go through the motions, to do something halfheartedly, routinely, or as a formality or façade.

_"Neither love nor fire can subsist without perpetual motion; both cease to live so soon as they cease to hope, or to fear." - François de la Rochefoucauld_

* * *

**Hogwarts, September 3rd. 1997**

Harry sighed as he stirred his potion, a frown on his face. Professor Snape was looking at him with a scowl. He looked hateful, like Malfoy, had earlier. Harry couldn't understand why, though. He was nice, wasn't he?

He never gave people a hard time, not like that boy Malfoy. The teen had stopped him in the hall on his way to class and gave him an ear full. Harry couldn't understand why and it hurt so badly. He could practically feel a blow with everyone hateful word.

It continued in Potions class. "What's the matter, Potter? You look like you're going to go crying to your Mummy…oh, wait, I forgot that she's dead," he spat, lazily dropping something into the potion simmering in Harry's cauldron. Harry couldn't help notice what Malfoy had done and without thinking he shoved his cauldron toward him, then suddenly ducked down below his desk.

Malfoy screamed as the cauldron overturned with a splash and the boiling liquid seared his arm. Professor Snape yelled, too. "Fifty points from Gryffindor!! Potter, you can expect to have detention with me for the rest of your life if you do something like that again!" the man roared.

The boy being yelled at flinched back from where he sat on the floor. Severus eyed him suspiciously because Harry did indeed look like he was going to cry. His breathing was erratic and his face was flushed.

"All of you out!" Severus roared as he made his own way out of the lab, ushering Draco to the Hospital Wing.

Without even realizing it, everyone left Harry all alone in the classroom. The boy continued to sit on the floor, glaring down at it helplessly. He could feel the tears burn his eyes, and his fists were clenched. What had he done to make these people so angry with him?

He sniffed, wiping his nose with his sleeve, and stood, angrily grabbing his bag and he trudged his way out of the room. This feeling was foreign. His soul felt like it was on fire, he wanted a release.

He wanted to hurt that boy again, and the thought horrified him as he made his way quickly to his four poster bed, ignoring everyone on his way there.

The fear…this feeling over whelming him as he buried himself in his bed; the way he got there seemed nonexistent.

**London, Underground, Voldemort's Head Quarters, September 3rd, 1997**

Voldemort was sitting at his desk, a small indescribable emotion marring his face every so often as he continued to go over reports. He had them spread haphazardly over his desk. He would look from one to the other and then back again, analyzing every detail, seeing if one Death Eater's work could be linked to another's somehow.

His Elite went through most reports and sent the oddities to him, the ones that could be the cause of a rebellion or a conquest. He looked up at Lucifer as the boy gave yet another sigh; he hung loosely on a couch opposite Voldemort. One leg dangled from the couch's arm, the other was folded beneath him. He had one arm propped up on the back of the couch while the other one fell at his side.

The young man laughed, his hair swinging around his arms, "That's priceless," he murmured. Voldemort resisted the urge to ask exactly what was 'priceless' and continued on with his work, his posture tensing slightly every time he heard another chuckle or shout.

He finally snapped, "What are you babbling about!?"

Lucifer, not the least bit intimidated, rolled his eyes before answering, "I've just realized…that when my counterpart is asleep, I have full reign over his body. I like what lead to that discovery though," he finished idly, twirling a strand of his hair around his fingers in a habitual gesture.

Voldemort just lifted an eyebrow waiting from him to continue.

"It seems Malfoy and Snape were giving precious little Harry a hard time, and I suppose that when I was kicked out of his body all negativity left too. He doesn't know hate, or anger; he can't comprehend anything besides what an infant would. He can't understand why Draco and Severus are so mean to him; he doesn't know how to deal with it. Then his fear turned to anger, and he wanted to hurt Draco again, an over turned cauldron, and he frightened himself. That led to him holing himself up in his dorm room. He passed out, I'm guessing, I have free reign of his mind."

Voldemort looked down at his desk, his eyes unseeing as he processed all of the information and his mind went to work. If Lucifer had full reign over Potter's consciousness, his body, he could take Hogwarts, in every sense of the word! He was Harry Potter in that body, and Lucifer once was Harry, so the switch would barely be recognizable. If there was even a difference that is, they really were once the same person.

"No."

"You don't even know what I'm thinking, Lucifer."

"Yeah, I do."

"Then what, pray tell, is it?"

"You want me to masquerade as Potter."

Voldemort narrowed his eyes as he looked up at the young man. "And what problem do you have with that?" he hissed.

"None really, I just like doing the opposite of what you tell me." Lucifer purred as he tilted his head back, a smile playing on his lips.

"I should curse you!" Voldemort hissed.

"You wouldn't."

"How dare you, you little deviant! _Crucio_! You will learn to respect me, even if my Death Eaters aren't here anymore, I think it's time you learned proper respect you filthy Half-Blood!" He held the spell and watched as Lucifer fell back onto the couch, a moan falling from his lips as his chest rose and fell rapidly. His formerly black and golden eyes had changed back to their emerald, which were dilated in pleasure as he writhed on the couch.

Voldemort swore as he lifted the spell. That wasn't even punishment; all he'd done was stimulate the boy…without relief. He grinned wickedly as he went back to his work, his emotionless mask falling back into place as he ignored the man across from him.

Lucifer's chest continued to heave as he stared over at Voldemort… He ached, terribly. Voldemort was no fun like this. He was determined to at least find release and it wasn't going to be by himself. Besides, he could use this new information as a leverage while doing it, and no one, ever, called him a Half-Blood and got away unscathed. Not anymore at least, especially when the accuser happened to be of mixed blood himself.

The young man pushed himself off the couch, slowing his breathing as he stood and started silently unbuttoning his shirt.

"You don't even know why I don't want to do it?" he asked.

Voldemort finally looked back up; his emotions flickered slightly as he saw the feast – sight in front of him.

"I'll indulge you: why is it that you will not masquerade as Potter?"

Lucifer smiled coyly as he let his shirt fall slowly to the floor.

"As soon he falls asleep, I'm going to attack his mind." His hands moved down to unbutton his trousers. "I'm going to find everyone he was close to and in turn me," he popped the button, "and lure them all to our side. One by one, but the only thing is…he'll be the medium. Now if you'll excuse me. I'm going to take a shower." With that he was gone and Voldemort groaned as his show was taken away from him.

Lucifer was his; the little deviant had nerve to parade around in front of him like that just to leave! Voldemort snarled as he stood, following the other man's magical signature. While the plan was rebellious, ingenious, and positively Slytherin, it wasn't _his_.

As he neared the man's room, he indeed heard the shower running. He cast a Silencing spell on his feet as he made his way into the bathroom, his clothes disappearing with a second thought. He almost scoffed at himself: this was his house and he was sneaking into his guest's room. What had become of the Dark Lord he had once been?

He turned devious, that's what.

Said man smirked wickedly as he stepped in behind Lucifer, quickly trapping the man against the wall, grinding against his arse.

Though Voldemort couldn't see it, Lucifer's eyes closed blissfully and his hands tensed up where they were propped on the wall. He pushed back against Voldemort and moaned throatily, as the older man's hands pressed his into the wall.

Voldemort watched on in a detached sort of fascination. This…young man was a puzzle. He was a puzzle that Voldemort would solve, that he wanted to solve, that he _would_ solve.

"You've only been here four days, Lucifer." It was a deadly hiss. "You've already unhinged me; I want to control you, to take my wand to you, my hand, even. Your disrespectfulness fuels my desire, my need to dominate you, to master you totally. Your strip tease, you deviant, has me hard. Can you feel it?"

Lucifer nodded restraining a smile; this was turning out better than he'd hopped. His head arched back to rest on Voldemort's shoulder as the man whispered into his ear.

"You boggle my mind; I don't think you merely _like_ doing the opposite of what I wish. I think you're drawn to it. This is what you wanted, isn't it? You knew I would want you like this after your little show, did you not?"

"Did you not!?" Voldemort growled dangerously when Lucifer made no indication of answering.

"Yes!" the man shouted, "Yesss, I knew, I wanted to provoke you, I wanted...that feeling back from when I first arrived."

"Danger?"

"Yesss."

"Pain," Voldemort said more firmly.

"Yes," Lucifer practically whimpered this time.

"We've been sworn enemies," Voldemort purred into the other man's ear, "at one time, we were complete opposites. This is forbidden, my deviant. You are tasting forbidden fruit. Do you like it?"

"Yes."

"The Gods will not be happy."

"They can go take a flying fuck off a bridge in America for all I care," the young man spat, as if he was never in a sexual frenzy to begin with.

"Your enemies-"

"Yes, they wanted to kill me. Did you think I was joking when I said the Gods would fall and anyone at Hogwarts that stood in my way?"

Voldemort let out a noncommittal sound and began to push against Lucifer again. "It is of no importance at the moment." Voldemort nuzzled the side of Lucifer's neck, one hand falling from his to tangle in long black hair, twisting in it as he craned the man's head back with it. "I have much more important things to attend to," he hissed before he smashed his lips down on Lucifer's cruelly, only pulling away for a moment to whisper harshly in the man's ear, "Touch yourself for me."

Lucifer obeyed, tormenting the other man as he began to stroke himself with agonizing slowness. An arm roughly pulled him closer and the young man smirked as his exaggerated writhing ripped a moan from the other wizard's throat. Voldemort's thrusts became more frantic as he kissed the neck of his new plaything, sucking roughly at the nape, leaving his mark, kissing his way back to Lucifer's mouth. His tongue teasing Lucifer's own as the younger man's eyes dilated in pleasure.

The kiss ended and Voldemort stared into hazed emerald eyes, his own gaze intense with hunger. Lucifer's fist clenched tighter, his strokes faster, and he began to whimper with the abuse of his body. "Close, so close…" And then his fingers and arm were ripped away as Voldemort pulled them both to the floor.

Lucifer straddling the older man's waist as Voldemort held his hips harshly, his mouth covering Lucifer's as he showed nothing akin to mercy.

The younger man pushed against him roughly as Voldemort forced his hips. Lucifer's hands resting on his chest as the younger used it for leverage. His head was thrown back, his mouth open as he panted. His hands began to move, tracing Voldemort's chest, up his neck, holding him there as he thrust against him. The orgasm from a few seconds ago coming back on a tidal wave as it crashed down on him. He screamed as he came, Voldemort's pulling and pushing ruthless before Lucifer felt the warmth of his cum on his skin.

The man pulled him towards him, Lucifer laying his chin propped on the man's shoulder, his breathing still laboured.

"Maybe…just maybe I'll be a little more lenient with you, my deviant; since you seem so inclined to defy my will," the Dark Lord whispered as he nuzzled the nape of Lucifer's neck. The young man became sluggish against him with the words. Voldemort's arms snaked around him possessively and he bit into his, continuing the mark he had placed their earlier.


	3. Structure

**Title: **My Own Destruction  
**Summary: **Harry is divided into two beings when he cannot chose a side in the war. His darker counter part seems to be the more dominant of the two. Especially when Lucifer joins Voldemort. Leaving the light of Harry to strive against the growing darkness.  
**Warnings:** Slash, Graphic stuff (real mature, haha.) Death, Torture. All the good things in life.  
**Beta:** Probably still **mizstorge**/pipenerd, if not she'll say otherwise.

* * *

**Structure**: a complex system considered from the point of view of the whole rather than of any single part

_"I prefer winter and fall, when you feel the bone structure of the landscape - the loneliness of it, the dead feeling of winter. Something waits beneath it, the whole story doesn't show_."

-Andrew Wyeth

* * *

**September 4****th****, 1997**

"That's not exactly what I had planned for last night, but I'm not complaining." Lucifer mumbled to him self as he tumbled off the couch. He looked up to find Voldemort where he'd been the day before.

"Then why don't you go do what you were going to do?" the red eyed man hissed out.

"Because Harry's not asleep, you dolt!"

"Remind me why he has to sleep?"

"Because I need a bloody wand," Lucifer hissed, trying very hard to reign in his temper.

"And what is Harry's part in all this?"

"Well, he is kind of my vessel to the Light's world. Well…they think it's theirs anyway. That's all about to change. I need a wand, I was about to make a split second trip after I made my decision."

"More like split second decision."

"Maybe," Lucifer grinned cheekily. "Still though, I need a wand, and Harry can help me get one."

"Well then, go on,"

"Weren't you listening? He's awake now. I can't do anything. He doesn't forfeit control until he's asleep.

"That sounds very odd."

"Well…I guess it's his subconscious recognizing me as him, and him as me, and therefore allowing me control of my old body." Lucifer stopped for a second, "Too early in the morning?"

"Maybe after another cup of tea," the man agreed. "Besides that, I need to know what else is going to come about with this discovery."

"Nah, I think I'll let you squirm."

"Lucifer."

"Don't get 'em in a bunch Voldemort, I still have to figure some things out. It's all right."

The man hissed lightly before turning back to his desk. "What ever, get out of my sight."

"Yes sir," Lucifer purred as he stood; a small grin on his lips as he exited the room.

Now it was time for some real scheming to begin. He couldn't do anything with Voldemort around. Well…not anything _foolish_, anyways.

**September 5****th****, Hogwarts Gryffindor Boy's Dorm**

Harry snuggled deeper into his pillows, and then his eyes eerily snapped open and he suddenly sat up. He yawned, and got out of bed, shuffling towards the stairs leading down into the common room, mumbling sleepily to himself.

He reached the bottom of the stairs. No one in sight_. _Lucifer grinned maliciously. This was too easy.

He made his way into the halls, passed many corridors, and quietly slipped past the many portraits so as not to wake them. With just a glance, the gargoyles guarding the entrance to the office began to move and he made his way up the stairs. He opened the door and stole a glance inside, everything was clear.

Lucifer's expression didn't change as he walked into Headmaster Dumbledore's office. He looked around, marvelling even though he'd seen the place dozens of times.

If this was all the Light had, they were doomed. He'd gotten out of bed, Harry's bed anyway, and made his way into the core of the Light, and he hadn't been hindered. Not one bit.

He made his way over to his goal, Fawkes, the Headmaster's phoenix; for now anyways.

"Hello there," he whispered softly, running his fingers gently against the bird's back. The phoenix awoke to the touches, keening softly. "Do you know who I am?" The bird responded by nodding its head.

_**Yes, Lucifer, I know.**_

"Do you know why I'm here?" he asked.

_**That, I do not know**_.

"I need a feather from you, my wand must remain with this body and though Voldemort's wand is its twin, I'm certain he will not lend it to me. Will you be able to grant this to me, Phoenix Fawkes?" The bird cocked its head to the side, as if considering this request.

_**You fight against the Headmaster?**_ he rasped.

"Yes, I do, but indirectly. The gods demanded I choose a side and became spiteful when I refused. They twisted my magic to split my personality. I've become Lucifer, the darker counterpart to the body I'm in now."

_**Dark understands Light much more clearly than Light can ever understand Dark,**_ the phoenix said.

"Will you lend me your aid, then?" Lucifer asked formally.

_**I will, and with more than a core for a wand. If you ever need me, all you need to do is call. This prison will not continue to be my home for much longer.**_

"I thank you, phoenix. Now, will you give one, or shall I take it?"

_**Just choose one and give it a small, soft, tug. I will release it willingly, works much better that way.**_

Lucifer nodded, smoothing down the phoenix's feathers as he decided on a feather. He chose one that was a crimson red, just like Voldemort's eye, then bleeding into blue and a pale, almost whitish hue. Just like fire

He always did like to play with matches.

He gave it a gentle tug, and Fawkes keened, and soon the feather was Lucifer's. He held it in his hand, marvelling over it, his fingers tracing its contours. He could literally feel the magical energy flowing off of it.

No wonder there had only ever been two phoenix feather wands. It was pure energy, just thrumming through you, like a fire that started low and slowly began to breathe; growing until it was a raging inferno.

"Thank you again, Fawkes, it's amazing," Lucifer complimented. Lucifer held the feather as if it was a glass object that was priceless in the eyes of the beholder.

_**My pleasure, young Lucifer, remember: you only need call and I will come.**_

"Then my work here is done. I would still like to plead that you will not speak, even though I know you will keep your honour that you would not speak of me or of this to the Headmaster."

_**What the old man doesn't know won't hurt him, not now anyways. Your secret is safe. Goodbye.**_

It was a clear dismissal, and Lucifer took it as such, leaving as quietly as he'd come.

He went back to the dormitory, settling himself back in bed.

Harry blinked a couple of times as he yawned, snuggling into his pillow sleepily. That had been one strange dream.

**Underground, London, Voldemort's Place, September 5****th**** 1997**

Lucifer sighed as he fell onto his bed, well, a bed really, but it was first the bed he had found. His body felt sluggish, and his mind was even further behind. He moaned, unconsciously, sinking further into the bed and taking a deep inhalation of the scent on the sheets. He was out long before a door opened and Voldemort walked in to see the boy laid out on his newly made bed, a towel wrapped around his own waist.

He sighed in frustrated defeat and began to get ready for the day. He would deal with Lucifer later.

For now, he had to deal with a Death Eater meeting. He had to concede though, that he was happy it was only his Elite. He didn't think he could deal with stupidity today.

He walked over to his wardrobe, dropping his towel as he began to shift through what he had to wear. A pair of black trousers and a forest green, almost black, shirt; then he donned his black robe and left the room quietly.

Lucifer was on his mind…the young man was a deviant, literally. He was captivating though, and he picked up on things quickly. Even though he was usually annoying the hell out of him, Voldemort had to admit, even though it was to himself, that the young man's presence was…soothing. That's all he could handle to acknowledge.

He wanted to say that he liked having the younger man with him but at the same time, he wanted him dead and gone. He growled impatiently, he hated emotions; they were so damned hard to deal with.

He strode into his office, sitting down at his desk and looked up just in time to see his Elite enter.

These meetings were so much more comfortable too; he didn't have to sit on stone.

"Adrian, Lucretia, Nathaniel, Lilium, good morning," he greeted the four as they sat down sitting down parallel to his desk.

"Morning, Voldemort," Lilium grinned, nodding to the man.

"Good morning, Lord." That was Nathaniel.

"Lord Voldemort." Adrian never wasted time in pleasantries.

"'ello, Lord." Lucretia was about as upbeat as Lilium.

"How are the other Elites fairing?" their lord asked.

"Isabella is having a baby!!"

Lillium was almost smacked upside the back of her head by Nathaniel who rolled his eyes. "Nickoli is in a meeting with the Minister, I believe today was the day he was going to poison the man."

"You wish, Nate. You know he went in today to give the man Vertiserum to catch up on all the recent events." Adrian shot back.

"Why can't you two just settle this in the bedroom all ready? Geez, you two are horrible. Unresolved sexual tension aside, I saw Lucius the other day. He was cracking down on some of the new recruits who seemed to think they had become all-powerful since receiving the Mark." Lucretia pointed out, getting to the matter at hand.

"He's very good at that, but I would not trust him with the power my seven Elites hold."

"We know that, Lucretia just likes being self-deprecating. Though not every one can be-" Lillium was cut off when Lucretia smacked her upside the head as the others chuckled in appreciation at the display.

"Unresolved sexual tension, you say?" Nathaniel teased.

"That wouldn't be the only sexual frustrations here, right my Lord?" Adrian's eyes lit up merrily as Voldemort almost broke the quill he was holding.

"Remember, we are your Elite, Lord, we see everything. It's why we're here."

"Your thoughts then?" he asked pensively, settling back in his chair with his fingers laced together, looking at Lucretia.

"He's fucking awesome!!" Lillium exclaimed.

"He's good for you, if a bit eccentric. I think he could be a brilliant strategist if you gave him the opportunity to learn. His mind seems interesting, imaginative. He sure knows what he wants though," Nathaniel finished with a smirk.

"He's vengeful, independent, and strong too." Adrian added, even though it was obvious.

"Exactly what you two need: a strong individual to keep you in your place."

"Then I suppose I have your approval," Voldemort said dryly. The girls burst into giggles, nodding their heads. The men hid their smirks with raised hands. "What do you suppose we do, though?"

"Pin him to a bed?" Lilium cringed as Lucretia tried to smack her again.

"Send him on missions. I believe if he gets too bored he may be impossible to deal with. He seems like the kind of person to take things into his own hands. Like yesterday." that earned Nathaniel a smack as the girls laughed again.

"I agree, don't chain him down. I think this has more in store for us than we could ever think of."

"Definitely need to keep ears and eyes open," Lucretia agreed.

"Isabella's having a baby?" Voldemort asked, switching the subject.

"Yeah, some bloke from America, don't know how she met him, don't want to know why. He seems fair though."

"They haven't been married yet; it's causing a really big fight between the two families, considering the baby wasn't conceived in wedlock."

"Stupid thing to romp about, if you ask me. Some people don't even think before they bring a little one into the world. There are plenty of unwanted kids out there, some with no Mums and others without Papas."

"A shame if you ask me. It's the Muggleborns most of the time, coming back into the Wizarding world pregnant by some Muggle."

"You can't blame the children for their parent's mistakes."

"I agree with whats-her name," Lucifer said, leaning against the doorway. "Just like a first generation Muggleborn shouldn't be blamed for their parent's decision of integrating. The Halfbloods that live in the Wizarding World are another story; anything past second generation can't be replenished, something about substances being too dangerous to mess with. Sorry 'bout the bed," he finished.

"I'll deal with that later. What were you doing though, that you arrived back so late?" Voldemort demanded. Lucifer only rolled his eyes at the domineering man and reached into the pocket of his fresh robe he'd put on pulling out the phoenix feather.

"I was acquiring this. Dear Fawkes allowed me to have it last night when I paid him a visit."

"The Light's leader; Albus Dumbledore's phoenix? I'm sorry; my name is Lucretia, that's Adrian, Nathaniel, and Lilium."

"Yes, well…he's not exactly Dumbledore's anymore. His words were: you need only call me, and I will come. So I suppose he's my friend now." Lucifer grinned boyishly. "Wonderful how that works out. Now I won't have to spy on him myself, I have someone to do it for me," said excitedly, his voice lighting up.

"Why did you need the feather?" Adrian asked.

"Aren't you supposed to be his Elite?" Lucifer shot back.

"He needed a wand," Voldemort cut in, glaring heatedly at Lucifer.

"Aren't there suppose to be seven of you?" Lucifer wondered thoughtfully.

"And why would there be seven?" Voldemort asked dryly.

"Well, seven Horcruxes, seven Elite, seven people to guard them with their lives." The study went almost deathly silent as the four Elite there sat up straighter, awaiting Lord's orders.

"What would bring you t o that conclusion, Lucifer?"

"I have all of Harry's memories, remember? I know you have Horcruxes. I don't know what or where they are, but I know you have them."

"I wouldn't need someone to protect the seventh," Voldemort said with a thin smile. "That one can protect itself."

"So that's what that is!" Lucifer exclaimed loudly, tapping his head where the famous scar used to sit. The Dark Lord nodded, a smirk tugging at his lips, "Too bad I left Harry with only a memento," he purred, grinning almost devilishly.

Voldemort smirked, "Only you, the opposite of everything."

"'Course, I was born that way, I'm like…the embodiment of the opposition, of the forbidden, of disobedience. Any of them work; I've been playing with them for awhile. It's true though, the most fun comes out of testing your, and other peoples', limits. I'm going though. I only came to see what was going on. It was bugging me after you left."

Adrian lifted an eyebrow to his Lord once Lucifer had left the room, "Are we going to get an explanation?"

"Most likely not, Adrian. Is there anything else you want to tell me though?" he asked them, looking over his Elite lazily.

"Things are slow right now." Nathaniel said as he rolled his wand over his knuckles, back and forth, back and forth.

"Then there's nothing more here, if something does com-"

"We know: notify you immediately," Lilium droned in perfect imitation of Voldemort as the Dark Lord looked at her, annoyed.


	4. Facade

**Title: **My Own Destruction  
**Summary: **Harry is divided into two beings when he cannot chose a side in the war. His darker counter part seems to be the more dominant of the two. Especially when Lucifer joins Voldemort. Leaving the light of Harry to strive against the growing darkness.  
**Warnings:** Slash, Graphic stuff (real mature, haha.) Death, Torture. All the good things in life.  
**Beta:** Probably still **mizstorge**/pipenerd, if not she'll say otherwise. Wouldn't want her getting credit for my HORRIBLE mistakes!

* * *

_**Facade**_ (noun): a showy misrepresentation intended to conceal something unpleasant

"_It's the people who try to be clever who never are; the people who are clever never think of trying to be." - Gilbert Parker_.

* * *

**21:00 September 5****th****, 1997**

Lucifer moaned in his sleep when he felt Voldemort place a hand on his shoulder.

He was lying in bed. He was lying in bed, face burrowed into the pillows. His shirt was riding up his back, and his pants were slung dangerously low.

Voldemort slowly moved his fingertips over the younger man's shoulders, up his neck, and then into his hair.

Lucifer whimpered, arching his neck back so the hand in his hair would become firmer.

"Wake up, Lucifer, you're being very naughty. You're sleeping in my bed; do you think you deserve that? Do you think you could ever be enough to me? To grace my bed as you are? I told you, I would deal with you later. That was not an incentive for you to come back." Voldemort spoke coldly, almost detached.

Lucifer only groaned, sluggishly moving his body so he was lying on his back. His eyes opening to reveal the black and gold that Voldemort was so unused to seeing. When Lucifer was with him, he only ever saw the emerald eyes.

There was pure need in those eyes, pure instinct, and Voldemort almost felt guilty for what he was about to do.

He grabbed the young man by his collar, jerked him off the bed, and started the trek back to Lucifer's own rooms. It wasn't until they were just reaching the doors that there was some type of protestation.

"What the bloody hell!? Stop manhandling me you wanker!"

Voldemort's lips twitched at the insult, and he threw Lucifer face first against the doors to his room, lodging a knee between his legs.

"Did I not tell you, I would be dealing with you later? What gave you the right to place yourself back in my bed?" he demanded icily.

"Your…I was only ever in your bed once and it was a complete accident!! Then I woke up, went to your office and then….I was walking…and then there was blackness. What did you do to me!! I didn't do anything! All I remember is walking out of your office and then you manhandling me!! Get the fuck away from if you're going to be accusing me of stuff I didn't do!"

Voldemort cocked his head, looking at the younger man, "You're not lying, are you?" he hissed, his knee moving higher. Lucifer let out a needy moan at the contact.

"Didn't…do…anything….swear….ahh,"

"You were very rude, interrupting my meeting earlier."

"Felt…magic…too much in one place, thought you….might need help," he got out between moans and erratic breaths.

"Hmm, maybe…just maybe you deserve a reward." Voldemort purred, his hands settling on Lucifer's waist to pull the younger man fully onto his leg.

Lucifer threw his head back and keened, "Please…." His hand searched against the hardness behind him and once he found what he was looking for, he twisted and with that, they both went tumbling into the room.

Lucifer was whimpering as he ended up on the floor. Voldemort loomed above him, his leg pinning the man's erection.

"Please….what?" Voldemort taunted him.

"Fuck me."

"Gladly," Voldemort answered with a smirk on his face. "You'll have to get up, though. We travelled so far, I'm sure you can manage another meter or so." Lucifer only whimpered, holding on to him tighter.

Voldemort rolled his eyes, pried away the younger man's hands and stood up. He made his way to the bed, leaving Lucifer on the floor. He took the time to get his clothes off before dropping onto Lucifer's bed completely naked. He watched the young man on the floor and smirked to see him now breathing heavily.

Lucifer stood on shaky knees, almost ending up on the floor again as he saw Voldemort lying on his bed like it was his own. The scene the man made was hot, very hot.

Voldemort had an arm flung carelessly above his head, his cock was hard and a bit intimidating in size, and his eyes were blazing. Lucifer stumbled over to the bed, losing his clothes on the way. He crawled onto the man, falling against him as he kissed him senseless.

The heat was everywhere and it was engulfing him. Voldemort's warm body against his, his hands squeezing his arse and his fingers spreading him, slowly entering him as the Dark Lord teased him.

"Turn onto your back." Voldemort's voice was husky and low.

Lucifer only nodded, moving over on the huge bed while Voldemort knelt between his legs. Lucifer whimpered as he felt a finger slip inside his tight opening.

"So good…" His legs fell farther apart of their own accord as he lifted his hips. "Deeper," he panted and then he gasped as Voldemort touched a place that made him squirm with pleasure. Lucifer thrust down on the fingers in him, moaning as the movements became harsher, more out of control. Lucifer thrust up with a groan of dismay as the finger began to withdraw, and then he heard a low, evil laugh. A moment later, and he was whimpering as the single finger was replaced with three. Voldemort grabbed his thigh and began thrusting inside him, stretching the young man's opening until his cries of pain turned into wanton moans of pleasure.

Lucifer cried out in disappointment as the fingers withdrew, and then he felt Voldemort smoothing something cool and liquid against the sensitive skin around his hole. He didn't know what was going to happen, but he couldn't wait for it. He wanted something bigger, harsher, and rougher.

Lucifer watched hungrily as Voldemort moved away, applying the liquid to his cock with long, teasing strokes. Then the older wizard positioned himself above him and Lucifer bit his lip as he felt the head of Voldemort's cock pressing against his opening. Voldemort's hands slid beneath the younger man's 

hips, lifting him, and Lucifer keened as he felt his cock pushing inside him, deeper and deeper, until his nails were digging into the sheet and blankets beneath him. It hurt, and it burned, but it felt amazing. He was being opened and filled, ripped and healed all at once.

He would do this a hundred times over if it always felt like this. He would do – _Oh, yes, just like that! –_ he would do anything, anything, if Voldemort would only give him this…and apparently he'd already done something to deserve this, and he felt as though he was getting the better end of the deal.

Lucifer moaned obscenely as Voldemort pulled out only to slam back in quickly, setting a brutal pace for himself as he rammed the man into the bed.

"Oh fuck…" Lucifer whimpered, "Voldemort…oh fuck." He threw his head back, his hands almost ripping the sheets with his grip.

Voldemort leaned forward, sucking on the neck offered to him as he braced his hands on either side of Lucifer's head.

"This is your rebellion, Lucifer; you love my touch, don't you? My cock in you; this fire? You promised me this, and it'll never stop. You're mine!" Voldemort hissed as he bit deeply into the young man's shoulder, marking him physically.

Lucifer only arched up and screamed that he was Voldemort's; in every sense the man owned him now, and he screamed it for the gods to hear.


	5. Foundation

Title: My Own Destruction  
Warnings, Rating, Summary: See previous Chapters till I fix this.  
Beta: Still **mizstorge**

* * *

**_Foundation: The basis on which a thing stands._**

**_"Wonder is the foundation of all philosophy, inquiry the progress, ignorance the end" - Michel de Montaigne _**

* * *

**September 6, 1997, Voldemort's Chamber**

Harry awoke groggily, his body aching. He heard silence, and groaned. He was going to be late to class, there was no way his dorm would ever be this quiet otherwise. He threw himself out of bed but fell short when a hand grabbed his arm and pulled him back. He fell against a smooth warm chest and someone sighed softly in his ear.

"Go back to sleep, Lucifer, it's four in the bloody morning. Don't thrash around if you can't sleep."

Harry struggled in the grip, "Lu – cifer? I'm not Lucifer…who are you!! Let me go! Let me go, now!!"

The arm released him and Harry shot out of the bed, grabbing the sheet and wrapping it around his waist when he saw his naked state. He looked around wildly, his eyes widening when he saw who was in front of him, and what, and his hands grabbed at long raven hair shakily.

"Lucifer, if this is your excuse of a game, I suggest you stop before I hurt you," Voldemort hissed.

"Who is Lucifer!? And why the fuck am I here? Why were you touching me, you pervert?!" Harry shouted, pointing accusingly at the man.

"Lucifer-" Voldemort growled.

"Who the bloody hell is Lucifer?! I am Harry!! You've only been trying to kill me all my life! Have you finally fallen off your rocker, you crazy old bastard!!"

Voldemort shot to his feet, grabbed his wand and Stunned the young man, sighing aggravated as he looked down at Lucifer. This…was bad, very, very, _catastrophically _bad.

He let out a deep breath as he lay back down in bed, rolling onto his stomach to fall asleep. Lucifer could find his own way back into his body. He was too tired to do anything but continue sleeping.

**Hogwarts September 6th**

Harry screamed as he was shocked out of the body he'd just been in. Why had he been in Lucifer's body? Who was Lucifer? Why had Voldemort slept with him? Why did he look like a girl?

All that hair.

Actually, Harry didn't want to think about that. His breathing was heavy as he sat there, his hands shaking without his permission. He'd possessed someone…someone who felt like him. Someone's whose body felt like his own. He'd seen Voldemort; the man had been kind; he treated his lover well. That's obviously what Lucifer was, no other explanation. Not one he wanted to hear, anyway.

He sighed as he sat up, dragging himself out of bed at the ungodly hour to take a shower. He felt dirty…violated. Having your soul in someone else's body after they'd had sex felt pretty weird, especially since his body still tingled from what his mind had felt.

His legs were shaky as he stood in the shower stall. This wasn't right though, it shouldn't have happened. He sighed as he rested his head against the wall; the water beating down on his back. He had to tell the Headmaster. Dumbledore had to know, it wasn't safe otherwise. He wasn't safe otherwise.

He shuddered as he ran a bar of soap over his cuts, some of the lagers scabs falling and tearing off with the motion. He looked on in a morbid fascination as the wounds began to bleed again.

He knew it wasn't right and that a lot of people would look done on him, but it felt euphoric, and he wouldn't stop. Not for anyone. It helped with the anger. There was always so much hate, so much anger.

Had Voldemort ever felt this way? Had he ever cut? Or had it been the Dark Arts that helped him in his release? Is that where he'd gotten his high?

Harry had to stop himself from continuing that line of thought.

Voldemort was the enemy, plain and simple. It wasn't safe, right, or sane to think about the man like that. Voldemort was already lost to the world. He was insane.

Harry sighed, he felt dizzy, out of sorts. His head was clouded and his movements slow.

He couldn't continue like this, the constant put downs, the friends that hung out with him, while, at the same time, they clearly hinted they'd rather be some where else.

Professor Snape and Malfoy had to be the worst of all, though. Every word was hateful, nasty, and cut deeper then he had ever cut himself.

He self-consciously pilled his robes into his hands while he walked to class.

He'd found his own type of escape, and it made everything else much more bearable. This anger, this hate, it was uncontrollable, and raw and it was making him high.

He didn't want it.

And that knife had made it all go away. He'd start out so angry, so hateful…so lost. Then the intricate cuts would begin and he'd come back. It would be pointless at first, just stinging cuts, but they slowly drained him. Then he was there, and he was Harry, tired, but there.

He'd know where he was; who he was. At the end, that was all that really mattered.

Either time was passing him or he had Potions, a lot. He sighed as he slouched to his seat, his feet shuffling lazily. This seemed to be his torture room. He hated coming here, but it seemed to be where he spent most of his time.

"A bit hung over, Mr. Potter? Do you realize that's against school rules?" Harry's head shot up and something literally, and metaphorically, broke as he dropped his bag. It sounded like it could have been glass.

"I am not hung over! I do not drink, sir!"

Snape's eyes narrowed and he crossed his arms across his chest.

"Your obstinacy astounds me, Potter; you seem to inherit that from your drunk of a father as well. It seems you both go to the bottle."

Harry roared in anger, "Shut up! You're just being a bastard because you never liked him, you stuck up prick!"

Ron's mouth dropped and Hermione gasped as most of the class sat in shocked silence.

"Your impudence astounds me," Severus stated apathetically. "You've vexed me for the last time, Mr. Potter. Get your slovenly, raucous self out of my classroom," Snape finished with malice.

Harry did, too; all too gladly he stormed out, his anger seeming to permeate the room before he slammed the door shut behind him loudly.


	6. Betrayal

**Lucifer's Chamber, September 6****th**

Lucifer hummed deeply to himself, a very dark and heavy melody filling the room as he turned the bath water on. He turned on the cold tap for the sink and let it run, ignoring it as the water quickly turned icy.

Voldemort was still in the other room, the man had been in deep contemplation all morning. Lucifer took a guess that he wouldn't be having company for the bath he was about to take.

He meticulously got out of his clothes, folding them as he did. He slid easily into the almost scolding hot bath, hissing as the water washed over him; his back especially, it always seemed more sensitive.

He sighed once he was able to fully enjoy the water on his over exerted muscles. Sex, even though others would deny it, was a work out; usually when you were thrown against walls and other things of the nature.

He laxly prepared his little puffy that was in the bath tub. He was admiring his left arm, captivated by it as he continually ran the rough puff ball over it, he heard Voldemort as the man entered the room.

Lucifer smiled sickly as he began: "This is what Harry is doing right now, Voldemort...Isn't it fascinating? Such a Light person, one who fights against people who hurts the ones he loves; although, here he is, hurting himself. He wants it to turn redder, to bleed; to stop staring back at him, as if blaming it; to have the pain for himself, so no one else knows. He's looking down in fascination, guilty, but enjoying it. He drops it...and uses his nails instead when the sting starts to ebb away with the water." Lucifer said, following the motions, his small claws breaking the skin, the water slowly becoming pink.

He gracefully stepped out of the elaborate bath tub, almost gliding over to the sink where the water was almost flowing ice. He grabbed the cup on the sink, unmindful of Voldemort's guarded and calculating gaze as he filled the cup with cold water. He slowly looked at Voldemort through the mirror. The cup came up and he slowly poured the cold water over the rapidly bleeding wounds.

Then his knees gave out and he hit the floor, out cold.

Voldemort didn't know if he should approach the younger man or let him be. Considering there was blood pooling on to the floor, he decided against leaving him there. He stepped forward tiredly, his boots squelching with the blood; louder and louder the sound became as he came closer to Lucifer. He picked the younger man up, sighing as the blood flow started for his coat as he leaned Lucifer towards him, wary of the damaged arm.

As soon as he'd settled the younger man on the bed he'd made his way back into the bathroom. He went though the movements of getting a cloth; a basin which he made certain was clean; a towel to place under the boy, he found in the closet; finally some bandages that he made sure were sanitized. He'd done it the Muggle way to think.

Voldemort's mind was racing, and he hated to say looking at the younger man as he was unnerved him. He used the towel to keep the blood from getting onto the bed, moving Lucifer's arm from where it was propped on a pillow. He slowly took the basin and placed it next to him; he didn't want bloody soaking through the towel. He slowly soaked the blood into the cloth he'd retrieved, wringing it out into the basin. He snapped his wrist, his wand appearing in his hand; however, it went right back to the holster once it'd cast a disinfectant charm.

He took the bandages and meticulously wrapped them around Lucifer's arm, almost apart from the experience he was so deep in thought. He didn't put the items away this time, with a snap of his fingers the house elves took them away. He quietly set Lucifer into a comfortable position before walking away from the bed. He took a seat in one of the leather chairs placed by a book case on the far wall across from the bathroom.

This mind connection with Harry Potter ended, today. He would not have his deviant being lulled and then controlled unconsciously by the other's mind. His Lucifer would not be used in such a way. Voldemort sighed as he slouched in his chair though, his bottom moving slightly off the chair so he could recline easily, resting one elbow on a rest as he put his weight on it. He closed his eyes and let thought claim him. He didn't wait very long.

He'd been so deep in thought that time seemed to pass him. He opened his eyes what seemed like a short time later to realize it'd actually been several hours. He groaned as he stood from the chair, stretching his hands above his 

head. He moved to the bed, laying down next to Lucifer with a pensive look on his face.

Sleep claimed him there too.

Lucifer came to, Voldemort's weight settled against his right side. His arm stung something fierce as he shifted, forcing him to remember what had happened.

Hell, maybe he'd temporarily become sane.

It hadn't been the most brilliant thing he'd done. It was over though. He sighed, feeling awkward. Voldemort was practically laying over him. As many times as they're molested one another, Lucifer didn't want to take a luxury he was not allowed.

He wasn't too fond of the idea of snuggling into a Dark Lord that was awake.

He almost jumped out of his skin as the decision was made for him. Voldemort's arm had wrapped around his middle, bringing him closer as the Dark Lord sighed in his sleep.

"Mine," it may have been muttered in delirium, but something in Lucifer soared when he heard it. He nuzzled against the older man, allowing sleep to claim him again as he allowed himself to bask in the moment. There weren't any words for it. Voldemort smelt musky, not of alcohol per se, but something resembling it. It was earthy, and sweet, tangy even. It almost spoke: power and wealth.

Voldemort's frame was also strong, muscled. He could tell that during sex, but this was different.

Lucifer actually wanted to hit himself for noticing. When you started noticing things, things started changing, and he wouldn't change. He didn't want the Dark Lord to think he was weak.

He never wanted to be weak again.

_He was running, away from everything, and he felt free. _

_The rain drops were hitting him, but he didn't feel drenched; refreshed perhaps, awaken._

"_You'll be safe here, young Lucifer," the non descriptive voice echoed in the darkness, the rain muffling it._

"_Who are you?" he asked, feel quite stupid as he did so._

"_The Darkness,"_

"_You mean this place? My dreams?"_

"_And others like it, yes."_

"_Morpheus..."_

"_If you wish," there was a chuckle following the words and some of Harry's insecurities left him._

"_Why are you here?"_

"_I realize there is a war going on, and I, unlike many of my brothers and sisters, have chosen my side."_

"_Why would you fight with us? We have nothing to offer you."_

"_You are far more pure than you realize, Lucifer, don't allow others to taint you."_

"_I don't understand," he said looking around him, the rain looking ethereal, almost as if he was standing on water when they hit the ground. Each of them moving slowly and each with a different path._

"_You're not suppose to,"_

"Lucifer, wake up, I need you to be ready in a few hours.

"Yes, sir!" Lucifer said, reacting before he'd let the words sink in, "It's you, I apologize, I woke from a strange dream."

"What type of dream?" Voldemort asked cocking his head to the side slightly. He was laying on his side, facing Lucifer, one of his arms propping his head up.

"I think a god came to me, he allowed me to call him Morpheus." Lucifer groaned as he rubbed his face. "I hadn't realized that gods would actively seek me to offer aid in the war I've waged on their brethren."

"What did he speak with you about?"

"He told me I was purer than most gave me credit for, and not to let others make me think other wise. Told me I wasn't meant to understand what he was saying, which I didn't." He turned onto his side and burrowed back into the pillows, pulling the blanket around him tightly to keep the warmth he'd gained during the night.

"I want you to put your barriers up, Lucifer."

"How so?"

"I don't want Potter in you mind anymore, my deviant. Last night will not happen again."

"Yes...I can agree, last night was...something I don't want to repeat – ever – again." Lucifer finished softly.

"None of this," Voldemort said as he laced a hand into the hair he'd taken a liking to, "we're in bed: no sulking, you do that enough already." He finished in a murmur, pulling Lucifer to him with the grip he had on his hair, kissing him firmly.

Voldemort felt as Lucifer basically melted, kissing him back as he seemed to relish in the softness.

"I never imagined you this way, I couldn't even phantom it when I was Harry." Lucifer said softly once the kiss was broken.

"I believe I am privileged to have a private life. I also know that I can act anyway I want, whenever I want." Voldemort answered, the smirk on his face almost looked like a sin.

"I know; it's just...different."

"How so?

"I don't know."

"Then how is it different, Lucifer."

"Bloody hell I know, you keep killing what little points I'm trying to make." Lucifer finished, pouting as he leaned forward for Voldemort's lips again, whimpering slightly when he was obliged.

Voldemort's tongue was wicked. Pure and simple, it was almost acidic, but at the same time the weird tingling sensation that came with all kisses seemed to be amplified. He squirmed as Voldemort pulled him flush against his side, deepening the kiss for a short moment before he pulled away.

"I have something for you today, and you're to meet Nickoli, perhaps even Isabella. They're the Elites that were not present before."

Lucifer nodded.

"Do you want to share a shower with me or take one on your own?"

Lucifer shrugged, "I'll take one with you."

"All right, I need to change your bandages for you any way. Go get a change of robes." Voldemort ordered him as he got out of bed, going to start their shower. He set out the bandages and a clean cloth, setting his wand next to them. He gave a small smirk to Lucifer as he entered, both of them beginning to take off their clothes.

Lucifer almost purred as he stepped under the warm spray that seemed to scold his skin at the same time that it soothed it.

After the shower Voldemort attended to Lucifer's wounds, saying nothing else on the matter. Once they were dressed and clean he turned to the other man, "I'll be in the library, I want you to come and seek me out in an hour. I have something for you."

"All right," Lucifer answered, dropping back onto the bed. He immediately, and subconsciously, reached for one of Voldemort's pillows, burying his face in it.

"Master Lucifer!"

The young man's body literally jerked with the sound before he was opening his eyes slowly and turning towards the house elf that had called for him.

"Yes?"

"Master Voldemort is requests yous in the library,"

The young man nodded and the house elf disappeared with a small 'pop'. Lucifer took his time as he pushed himself off the bed. He blinked, disoriented. He hated sleeping small amounts of time. You always woke up feeling worse off.

He took to the library, his steps mindless as he let his thoughts wander. As he neared the room, he heard the voices he knew were the Elites'. He entered the room, with a grin; immediately he greeted the Elite.

"Adrian, Lillum, Nathaniel, Lucretia...you must be Isabella and Nickoli...aww such a cute kid." He said crooning over the baby in Isabella's arms.

"Lucifer, that's not why you're here." Voldemort said.

Lucifer focused his attention on him for a moment. Then Lucifer looked past Voldemort's shoulder, shocked.

Sirius Black was here; his Godfather was actually hearing him out. If anyone meant anything to him, this was the person. He stood to greet him, a smirk coming to his face as he felt the giddiness.

Then it was all wiped away when Sirius drew his fist back and slugged him in the side of the face. The entire room was silent, and Voldemort was looking on in rage, slowly stepping closer to the two.

"I'm not your father, and I'm not going to ask for an explanation, but you could have at LEAST told me you were alive, Harry. I was worried bloody sick,"

All Lucifer could do was blink owlishly and stare at his Godfather, but then Sirius was moving, again.

He swore to the Gods he hated and back, surely Sirius wasn't so – yeah…he was, never mind. Lucifer watched on in dawning horror as Sirius went through the same motions, landing a right hook to Voldemort's jaw.

"Bloody fucking hell," he whispered.

Voldemort only stumbled back slightly. He took a very deep breath and then turned back to the other man, "What, may I ask, was that for?"

"For not having enough sense to tell jackarse over there what to do." Sirius said, not unkind as he jerked his thumb towards Lucifer.

"I concede, but if you ever, even in the slightest, lay a hand on me again, I will break every bone in your body, manually. The pieces will be so small, people will mistaken them for dust, are we clear Mr. Black?"

"Crystal, My Lord," Sirius answered, looking the older man in the eye.

"And, Black?"

Sirius turned his head slightly from where he'd been looking over to his godson just in time for the punch Voldemort was throwing to connect with his jaw solidly, something cracking loudly in the dim quiet.

"We're even,"

"Sexual frustration again?" Nathanial whispered a little too loudly to Adrian and Nickoli. Lucifer tried so hard not to laugh his eyes looked about ready to pop out and even Voldemort's lips twitched.

"Very long, and unneeded, story," Adrian offered to Sirius' confusion.

"Why do I always miss the entertainment, Ad?"

"No clue, Sirius,"

"I'm missing something," Lucifer said slowly, looking around at the eight…well nine people in the room. Isabella and her child, Adrian and Nathaniel, Lilium and Lucretia, Voldemort and Sirius, and Nickoli, what was he missing?

"Seven, my rebel,"

Lucifer blinked, and blinked again as Adrian and Nathaniel chuckled.

"I thought you were the smart one," Isabella put in.

"Oh, I'm smart; I'm just sort of shocked stupid, that's all." Something exploded just out of his vision as he slowly moved his legs towards the door, his movements unsteady and heavy, like lead.

"Where are you doing?"

"To find a knife,"

"Why?"

"I haven't decided yet, Sirius, I've been lied to, cheated, almost killed, but I think you succeeded where everyone else failed. Betrayal, there's one I don't have in my books yet." Lucifer said as he slowly closed the door behind him.

The room was silent after he left, and the air seemed almost lethal when you looked at Sirius or Voldemort.

"Get out," Voldemort hissed, "get out of my home, Sirius, and do not come back until you are summoned.

Sirius looked like he wanted to argue but he held his tongue, "Of course, my Lord."

"You may make yourselves at home, if you hear screaming, yelling, cursing, it's probably best not to check it out."

"Sexual frustration,"

"If I hear that again in the next week, Adrian, I'm going to dismiss you."

"Of course, my lord," the man answered softly.

Voldemort nodded before leaving the room, he made his way to his own chambers, having a hunch that Lucifer would seek refugee there. It was his sanctuary, and for now, Voldemort could offer him that. He opened the door softly, almost halting completely as he saw Lucifer on his bed, his body shaking with sobs.

He looked young, he looked…his age.

"My deviant," he stated softly, closing the door behind him for privacy as he walked over to the bed. He crawled over to Lucifer pulling the younger into his lap.

"I don't think I can do this, Voldemort, I promised you me, but I can't. I can't do it anymore; I can't believe I fooled myself for that long. I'm a child playing an adult's game. I'll be the first to admit it." He let out in a sob, shaking his head helplessly, "I can't contain it: he was the only one. He was my father, my brother, my friend. He lied, all that time, he lied. What if I had never been split? What would he have done? What would you have had him done? He's practically blood, and he would have betrayed me to you." Lucifer sobbed as he lay against the man.

"This is unlike you, Lucifer,"

"I know,"

"It is not unwelcomed,"

The younger sniffed, looking up at Voldemort through one eye. "You're not human,"

"That does not mean I do not have a heart, my soul may be tattered and torn, but I am still here. I have grown fond of you, Lucifer, something that could be my demise."

"I'm loyal only too you though! I would never betray you, my lord!" Lucifer said in earnest, sitting up to stare the man in the eye anxiously.

"Are you finally letting down your barriers?"

"Yes,"

"Say it again,"

Lucifer sat for a moment before obliging, "My lord,"

"How I do like the sound of that coming from your lips," Voldemort purred as he kissed Lucifer softly. He pulled away very shortly after and quirked his lips, "What are you going to do with Sirius, my deviant?"

"I...don't actually know." Lucifer's hands came up to twirl his fingers in his long raven locks.

"When I was Harry, I only had two people I absolutely, positively, cared for: Sirius Black and Remus Lupin. I had other friends, and some adopted family. Next would be Nymphandora, Prof. McGonagall, and Snape even though he won't acknowledge it. These people are – were, they were important to me. Sirius, I guess, was just so in grained...he still feels like my family.

"I don't know how to deal with him. I'd rather not, but I will...eventually." Lucifer looked up at Voldemort to see if that's what he wanted to hear and when the older man nodded he relaxed against him.

"I believe its nap time,"

"Very funny," Lucifer growled playfully.

"No jest, I was being quite serious, my jaw is burning."

Lucifer purred lowly, crawling further into Voldemort's lap, "You punched him, my lord, I've never seen you hit someone. It was…hot,"

"Go take a shower, now, I was serious about a nap." Voldemort said, brushing the advance off.

Lucifer only pouted, pushing Voldemort back so he could nuzzle his neck, moulding himself against the man's side, "I concede," he whispered with a yawn.


	7. Confusion

**Hogwarts September 8****th****, Outside**

Harry sat by the lake, his feet part way in the water as he wrapped his cloak around himself tightly. It was mid afternoon so he still had some time before the water became too cold for him to keep his feet in.

The thing with Voldemort still weighed heavily on his mind. The man had seemed almost human, and to him...that couldn't be true. If he looked at Voldemort as a human, he couldn't kill him; it was as simple as that. The man had been inhumane and snake like when he'd fought him last. He hadn't been human, he'd been cold hearted and cruel...

Harry literally tried to shake the thoughts out of his head. Every day he tried to convince himself there was hope. That there would be an end, and when it came, he'd be free. That hope was slowly dying though.

Not to mention he'd seen Sirius' cousin Narcissa at the school. He frowned, his feet swaying in the water as he thought. The lady really was stuck up. Mr. Malfoy couldn't hold a candle to her.

He jerked harshly when something touched his foot in the water and he scrambled away with quick, rough movements.

"You need to relax more..." a little girl said as she poked her head out of the water.

"Wh-who are you!? How were you under the water?"

"I'm Hope...I would think, being a god, I wouldn't need to breathe under water. That was true, last time I checked anyway. You're Harry Potter, aren't you?"

"Yes..."

"Well...there's a war going on, you know?" she asked curiously, piling stones meticulously on the shore.

"I know, it's me versus Voldemort. I have to kill him."

"There's another war going on too!"

"What one?"

"Don't you know? You're missing something, bro-! My brother...he...took away your other half. Lucifer was stolen from you!"

"W-wait, who's Lucifer? Why was he stolen from me?" Harry asked hastily, moving further away from the lake.

"He was your darkness! The Gods saw that you were confused when it came to the war so-"

"I'm on the side of the Light! What's there to be confused about?"

"That's not how it was before though, Harry!" Hope almost shouted, shaking her head wildly.

"There are two of you. Lucifer doesn't care about you, or Voldemort, not even the Wizarding war. All he wants is revenge on the Gods who decided to kill him."

"If they wanted to kill him, why isn't he dead?"

"We don't know, but we'll try and try until we succeed in killing him. If you offer us your aid in taking him down, we'll help you in your war against Voldemort."

"I..." Harry nodded, "all right, it's a deal...just please...don't do that again,"

The little girl nodded, giggling, "Goodbye, brother," she said before she disappeared under the water.

Harry dropped back against the grassy ground, a groan of frustration leaving him. Things just continued to get worse. What had he just done?

**Voldemort's Library, September 9****th**

"My Lord?" Lucifer questioned as he ducked his head inside the library doors, grinning when he'd finally found Voldemort.

"What now?" the Dark Lord asked with an irritable sigh, rubbing the hand without the quill in it over his face. The other hand was scratching furiously along paper work and parchment.

"Is all that even necessary?"

Voldemort put his quill down, trying very hard not to snap it, "It's the only way I keep track of my Death Eaters without the mark. They're required to write down everything they do, related information, and take note of possible allies, and people they've talked to."

"You look frustrated,"

"Obviously,"

"Why?"

"_Because it's all nonsense!_" he hissed dangerously.

"All idiots?"

Voldemort only glared.

Lucifer rolled his eyes and was just going for the door when Voldemort's arms wrapped around his waist, the man biting his neck harshly, Lucifer tipping it to offer him more room. He keened when he was pulled flush against the hard body, Voldemort's erection hard and warm against his hip.

"You have company soon,"

"Do I look like I care?"

Lucifer looked the man over, his breathing still harsh, "Not at all," he murmured, dropping to his knees in front of the man as Voldemort leaned against his desk, "this will be the biggest gossip," Lucifer finished as he licked his lips slowly, already enjoying what he had yet to touch.

"No hands," Voldemort ordered with a smirk.

Lucifer only nodded, burrowing his head against the man's groin to separate his robes, using his teeth to pull on the single button. The zipper came next and he used his teeth to drag it down, waiting patiently for Voldemort to un-tuck himself before he practically jumped the man. Almost catching a finger as he greedily sucked on the man's cock, the head first as those fingers moved to tangle in his hair, Lucifer's knees parting slightly so he could sit between his ankles, his hands on the floor in front of him as he tried to permanently connect himself to his Lord.

He was as hard as the erection in his mouth and he moaned aloud, and without shame, as he stabbed his tongue into Voldemort's slit, tasting the pre-cum gathering there. The hands tangled in his hair encouraged him on as they drew patterns, shuffling his hair with a cool affection.

He could feel the magic moving towards them.

Maybe five minutes at most. He pulled back to the tip before slamming his head forward to swallow his Lord whole, Voldemort giving a shout as his knees wavered. The sounds were coming in earnest now as he made a crude imitation of a fuck, Voldemort's knuckles white as they gripped his desk.

"Ah...Luc...my deviant," Lucifer literally purred under the attention, his emerald eyes darkening as he sucked harshly on the man's erection, letting it slip out of his mouth he nuzzled against the man. He licked and sucked random places along Voldemort's length, enjoying it, captivating himself as he heard the sounds his Lord made.

He had just let out a loud moan when the double doors opened.

He heard a squeal; Bellatrix, he checked off mentally. There was a slight inhalation of breathe; Lucius, ever the pervert. Then there was a loud bang and Lucifer actually let the hard cock slide out of his mouth to get a look at Severus on the floor before rough hands were shoving that hard cock down his throat.

The hands in his hair turned soothing as he eagerly focused his attention back on his Lord, whimpering slightly, trying to nuzzle and deep throat all at once.

"_My beautiful deviant, how do you like them watching you? You'll make me cum in front of them, how do you feel?"_ Lucifer moaned as he came with the words, happy his cloak draped around him where he kneeled. He sucked harshly one last time and Voldemort came with a deep, guttural, moan.

"I think I feel pretty damn smug, My Lord," Lucifer answered thickly, his throat and mouth sore as he continued to kneel before his Lord. With a flick of his hand his Lord was presentable and Lucifer stayed kneeling on the ground, leaning slightly against the man as he stared at the three Death Eaters dispassionately.

Voldemort's hand settled in the younger man's hair as it fell to pool on the ground. "_You should get it cut,"_

"_But I like it..."_ Lucifer hissed back, grabbing a clump of hair to twist around anxiously with his fingers.

"What do you want?"

"My Lord...my ...wife has revealed herself to Dumbledore, she did it behind my back a while ago. I've just found out."

"Narcissa...she's Beauty," Lucifer murmured. The hand Voldemort had in his hair was tugging up and Lucifer followed the slightly painful motion.

"Elaborate. Now."

"She's the Goddess of Beauty,"

"How do you know that, Lucifer?"

"I don't know," the younger man said softly.

"Bellatrix!"

"Yes, My lord. The group you've set your eye on has accepted and says they'll settle for what you gave them."

"I see..."

"My lord, the Prob – Potter child is hopelessly oblivious to the things around him in the mind set he's in. He'll be a sitting lamb."

"Thank you Severus, Bella, Lucius. Now Leave."

The three of them did, bowing to their lord almost as one. Then the heavy doors closed behind them and Voldemort craned Lucifer's head up by his hair again forcefully.

"Exactly how were you split in two? What are you? How do you even know about the gods?"

Lucifer's eyes dilated and he followed the motion, his breathing becoming shallow. "Shouldn't you have been asking those questions when I first showed up?" he asked heatedly.

"I want to know, now, Lucifer." Voldemort almost hissed, tightening his hold in the younger man's hair.

"I don't know! I don't know! Now, let go of my hair," Lucifer whimpered.

Voldemort obliged, slightly lessening his hold on the younger man's hair. "How can you not know how you came to be in existence?"

"I don't know,"

"Is that all you can say, Lucifer?"

The younger man saw red, ripping his hair out of Voldemort's grasp as he threw himself into a standing position. His eyes darkened from gold to an off black.

"How the bloody fuck do you think I feel?! I'm alive and breathing, holding a grudge and I don't even know how it came about! It's ingrained, it's in me, and it'll never go away! It's a festering hate that I have no control of! I'm the one here and you're asking me questions anyone could answer. How do you think I feel, dammit!? I know nothing! I fucking hate it! I fucking hate you!" Lucifer screamed before disappearing.

**Hogwarts September 12****th**

Harry thrashed as he lay in his bed, screaming out wildly. In absence of reality, his subconscious was in control of his body as he dreamt. It was from a long time ago...at least to him.

_He was standing in front of twenty or so people. He could feel them; similar to how he could feel Voldemort or Dumbledore. He could individually feel them, yet they felt as one. That amount of power scared him. He could feel it rushing through his bones, into his consciousness, making him realize this power. This thing to fear._

_He screamed as that power targeted him. He wanted to hurt them back, he wanted to run away. His decisions were split in half, for every thing he thought of there was a contradiction. He'd never had these conflicting emotions, these thoughts. He could never think of hurting someone; had never wanted to hurt someone. _

_Yet here he was, his knuckles clenched. Curses and threats and pleas were flowing from his mouth. All of them seemed jumbled together to him, but what the others did contradicted that fact. They seemed to completely understand him. That scared him even more, because at the moment, he couldn't understand himself._

_He really wanted to hurt them now, turn this torture on them. His body was on fire, like it was being ripped in two from every angle. Everything seemed to be split...or trying to. _

_There weren't any thoughts now though. There was only pain and his screams as he heard them echo over and over again. He could hear the people surrounding him. Some were arguing his case while others adamantly refused...had they said live?_

_What right did they have to decide if he lived or not? None...they had none. _

_Then he saw black as he felt his body rip in two, a final anguished scream leaving his lips._

Lucifer screamed, which was echoed by his counterpart further up in the castle. He had been resting in one of the rooms in the Chamber of Secrets. He'd been so angry yesterday. Voldemort had pissed him off, truly and utterly infuriated him. That man...he hadn't had the right to say what he did. Voldemort had bypassed that though and assumed he'd owned Lucifer. Something the younger man refused point blank.

He tried to remember parts of the dream...parts of the dialogue between the...what were they? Gods? One part stuck out more than the others and he scrunched his nose up in thought as he remembered it.

_A young woman was walking up to him as the dream began to fade. She had lilacs laced into her hair, holding a sweet pea flower. She looked at him strangely before she moved in front of him. She dropped something in his hand and he looked down to see a Celtic embroidered chain and medallion. _

"_Not all the gods are against you, little Lucifer,"_

His gaze and hands snapped to his front and marvelled at the necklace that sat there.

"Siochan..." he murmured. His eyes were staring far off, as if he wasn't looking at reality. He sighed as he pushed back against the mattress he was on.

He twirled the medallion in his hand, his thoughts elsewhere. He'd been so furious at Voldemort, so furious he'd wanted to hurt the man; to kill him. He never remembered feeling like that, not even when he was a part of Harry.

His past was coming back to him, parts of it, at any rate. Siochan: he remembered her. Her voice was soothing and calm. While he'd endured that torture she'd spoken to him softly, trying to sooth his hurt. It all seemed like one bad nightmare he couldn't remember. One that you woke up from screaming: one that didn't allow you to go to sleep, scaring you into awareness.


End file.
